{"id":3838,"date":"2017-11-15T08:37:37","date_gmt":"2017-11-15T10:37:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mahila.lt.kirtiklis.serveriai.lt\/?p=3838"},"modified":"2017-11-15T13:22:41","modified_gmt":"2017-11-15T15:22:41","slug":"kokias-visuomenes-nelaimes-i-viesuma-iskele-istorija-apie-s-bartui-mestus-kaltinimus","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/2017\/11\/15\/kokias-visuomenes-nelaimes-i-viesuma-iskele-istorija-apie-s-bartui-mestus-kaltinimus\/","title":{"rendered":"Kokias visuomen\u0117s nelaimes \u012f vie\u0161um\u0105 i\u0161k\u0117l\u0117 istorija apie \u0160. Bartui mestus kaltinimus?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Vis\u0105 \u0161i\u0105 savait\u0119 klausiausi ir dairiausi aplinkui, pasyviai steb\u0117dama daugiausia visuomen\u0117s d\u0117mesio sulaukusi\u0173 tem\u0173 aptarin\u0117jim\u0105. Galvojau, gal patyl\u0117siu ir susilaikysiu nuo nuomon\u0117s rei\u0161kimo. Bet ka\u017ekaip \u0161iandien jau galutinai pratr\u016bkau.<\/p>\n

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M\u0117lyna spalva pa\u017eym\u0117ti vyr\u0173, ro\u017eine \u2013 moter\u0173 pasisakymai. Taip komentuoja vyrai ir vaikinai, kurie turi merginas, \u017emonas ir dukras. Regis, normalios, nekvailos moterys ir merginos. \u00a0Ir \u010dia mes matome tuos, sakykim, dar \u0161velnius pasisakymus, kuriuos d\u0117styti \u017emon\u0117s i\u0161dr\u012fsta su greta j\u0173 matomu vardu. Jei dar nemat\u0117t, geriau n\u0117 ne\u017ei\u016br\u0117kit, kas vyksta anoniminiuose portal\u0173 komentar\u0173 kloduose, nes gali supykinti.<\/p>\n

Ne\u017einau, kas i\u0161 ties\u0173 \u012fvyko re\u017eisieriaus \u0160. Barto ir dviej\u0173 jo seksualiniu priekabiavimu pasiskundusi\u0173 mergin\u0173 susid\u016brim\u0173 metu. O skubiai darytis i\u0161vadas \u2013 tarsi skub\u0117ti kim\u0161ti vos i\u0161 krosnies i\u0161trauktus pietus. \u012e kar\u0161t\u0105 patiekal\u0105 lengva lie\u017euv\u012f nusidegint. M\u0117gstam skubiai deginti knygas, nutraukti sutartis, i\u0161si\u017ead\u0117ti, atsisakyti, pasmerkti. Palaukit, pakv\u0117puokim truput\u012f. \u012ekv\u0117pkim, i\u0161kv\u0117pkim, o tada priimkim sprendimus.<\/p>\n

Bet man li\u016bdna, man skaudu, graudu, pikta, apmaudu, ne\u017einau, tr\u016bksta net \u017eod\u017ei\u0173 i\u0161reik\u0161ti tiems jausmams, kurie apima matant, kaip \u012f vis\u0105 \u0161i\u0105 istorij\u0105 reaguoja tiek daug \u017emoni\u0173. Apie smurt\u0105 prabilusios merginos murkdomos purve, keikiamos, kaltinamos noru i\u0161gars\u0117ti, pasipelnyti.<\/p>\n

Po velni\u0173, t\u0173 b\u016bd\u0173 i\u0161gars\u0117ti ir pasipelnyti yra \u0161imtai. Ir klausimas, koks sveiko proto \u017emogus rinkt\u0173si \u0161tai tok\u012f variant\u0105. Neabejoju, kad nelengva buvo ir ilgai teko svarstyti prie\u0161 priimant sprendim\u0105 prabilti, suprantat, kad tavo asmeninis gyvenimas dabar jau bus po kaulel\u012f narstomas ir malonu nebus.<\/p>\n

J\u016bs jau\u010diat, kiek nemeil\u0117s, kiek vidin\u0117s agresijos visuose tuose komentaruose?<\/p>\n

Seksualinio priekabiavimo, apie kok\u012f dabar \u010dia \u0161nekame, laim\u0117, patirti neteko, tod\u0117l relatinti \u0161imtu procent\u0173 negaliu. Yra tek\u0119 sulaukti fizinio smurto i\u0161 nepa\u017e\u012fstamo vaikino naktiniame klube (ilgai buvau tikra, kad pati prisipra\u0161iau, nes papra\u0161iau jo nel\u012fsti prie draug\u0117s. Galvojau, kad pati kalta, \u012fsivaizduojat?) Yra tek\u0119 patirti psichologin\u012f smurt\u0105, kai tau dien\u0105 dienon sako, kad per daug nori i\u0161 gyvenimo ir menkina tol, kol pradedi tik\u0117t, kad gal rimtai geriau u\u017esidaryt kambary ir nieko nedaryt. Na, bet juk psichologinio smurto \u017eymi\u0173 vizualiai nesimato, tai jis kaip ir nesiskaito, ar ne?\u00a0 O vidines \u017eaizdas i\u0161silai\u017eyt u\u017etrunka dar ilgiau negu fizines.<\/p>\n

Visa \u0161i istorija apie skriaudas, kurias padar\u0119s kaltinamas \u0160. Bartas, veikia kaip lakmuso popier\u0117lis, ai\u0161kiai \u012f dienos \u0161vies\u0105 i\u0161temp\u0119s visuomen\u0117s skaudulius. Ties\u0105 sakant, naiviai tik\u0117jausi, kad jie ne tokie gil\u016bs. Juk atrodo, kad kaip visuomen\u0117 vis judam \u012f priek\u012f, tobul\u0117jam.<\/p>\n

O vis d\u0117lto. Lietuvoje ma\u017eai ne\u012fgali\u0173j\u0173, nes j\u0173 nematom gatv\u0117se, aplinkoje ma\u017eai homoseksual\u0173, nes jiems tenka sl\u0117pti savo orientacij\u0105, ma\u017eai priklausomybi\u0173 sukeliam\u0173 problem\u0173 turin\u010di\u0173 \u017emoni\u0173, nes apie \u0161i\u0105 j\u0173 identiteto dal\u012f tiesiog ne\u017einom, alkoholik\u0173 n\u0117ra, bet u\u017etat eil\u0117s alkoholio skyriuj driekias per vis\u0105 parduotuv\u0119, smerkiam alkoholikus, bet patys tose eil\u0117se stovim, vis dar n\u0117ra sekso ir n\u0117ra jo po atsirandan\u010di\u0173 padarini\u0173, nes apie juos tylima arba vengiama \u017einoti, ma\u017eai ir smurto \u0161eimose, apie kur\u012f ka\u017ekas garsiai kalb\u0117t\u0173, tod\u0117l atrodo, kad jo n\u0117ra, ma\u017eai supratimo apie psichologin\u012f smurt\u0105, tod\u0117l jo neatpa\u017e\u012fstam ir ignoruojam. U\u017etat daug savi\u017eudybi\u0173, nes \u0161it\u0173 tai taip lengvai nepasl\u0117psi. Ir daug emigruojan\u010di\u0173j\u0173, nes \u0161it\u0105 skai\u010di\u0173 irgi sunku pridengt, bet kai \u017emogaus neb\u0117ra, tai ir problemos kartu i\u0161va\u017eiuoja, ar ne?<\/p>\n

O ir atsiribojant nuo nusikaltim\u0173, kalbant apie intymius vyr\u0173 ir moter\u0173 santykius. Paprastai ir vis dar, jau baigias 2017-ieji, bet vis dar<\/strong> – mergel\u0117s kurvel\u0117s, kek\u0161\u0117s, merg\u0161\u0117s, kvai\u0161os, nuskintos g\u0117lel\u0117s, kuri\u0173 neva nieks v\u0117liau nebenor\u0117s ir nebegerbs, o g\u0117da vilksis per vis\u0105 gyvenim\u0105. O vyrai k\u0105? Na, nieko. Nuomon\u0117 neutrali, kartais dar ir per pet\u012f patap\u0161nojama u\u017e scorinim\u0105. O juk abi pus\u0117s lygiavert\u012f vaidmen\u012f atlieka situacijose.<\/p>\n

O dar v\u0117liau kitokiose socialin\u0117se situacijose, darbin\u0117je aplinkoje moterys prabyla apie nelygyb\u0119, o vyrai kalba, kad n\u0117ra gi nelygyb\u0117s, i\u0161sigalvojat, tada dar atsiranda moter\u0173, kurios jiems pritaria ir sako, kad nu tikrai n\u0117ra, mergel\u0117s kvai\u0161el\u0117s prisigalvoja tik.<\/p>\n

Kai apie darbe patiriam\u0105 vadovo L. M. Zaikausko priekabiavim\u0105 mamai sk\u0173stis prad\u0117jo Panev\u0117\u017eio Juozo Miltinio dramos teatro aktor\u0117 E. Ra\u010dkaityt\u0117, mama jai patar\u0117 pakent\u0117ti, palaukti, gal priekbiautojas aprims. Suprantat?<\/p>\n

Na ir gyvenam taip. Vyrai skriaud\u017eia moteris, moterys skriaud\u017eia vyrus, vyrai skriaud\u017eia vyrus, moterys skriaud\u017eia moteris, vyrai skriaud\u017eia patys save, moterys skriaud\u017eia pa\u010dios save ir tada visi toliau skriaud\u017eiam vieni kitus. Ir vaik\u0161tom po to tokie ma\u017eum\u0117l\u0119 pridubasinti, su savom tragedijom viduj.<\/p>\n

Dabar ir visada mums visiems labai nepro\u0161al b\u016bt\u0173 mokytis gerbti ir stipriau pamilti ir save, ir t\u0105 artim\u0105 savo. Nes kitaip, jei ir laukia ateitis, su gyvenimu laisvoje, \u012f priek\u012f \u017eengian\u010dioje Europos valstyb\u0117je ma\u017eai pana\u0161um\u0173 ji teturi.<\/p>\n

O geriausiai visk\u0105 susumuoja Au\u0161ros i\u0161reik\u0161ta nuomon\u0117 \u0161iuo klausimu ir v\u0117liau po juo pateiktas Mariaus komentaras su skaudoka statistika.<\/p>\n

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Vis\u0105 \u0161i\u0105 savait\u0119 klausiausi ir dairiausi aplinkui, pasyviai steb\u0117dama daugiausia visuomen\u0117s d\u0117mesio sulaukusi\u0173 tem\u0173 aptarin\u0117jim\u0105. Galvojau, gal patyl\u0117siu ir susilaikysiu nuo nuomon\u0117s rei\u0161kimo. Bet ka\u017ekaip…<\/p>\n

Skaityti daugiauKokias visuomen\u0117s nelaimes \u012f vie\u0161um\u0105 i\u0161k\u0117l\u0117 istorija apie \u0160. Bartui mestus kaltinimus?<\/span><\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3853,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1384,1387],"tags":[1760,260,323,1961,603,1833,1958,1957,1964,1959,1960,1955,1523,1962,1963,1954,1953,1009,1113,1956,1965],"class_list":["post-3838","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-jausmai","category-visuomene","tag-ausra-kaziliunaite","tag-emigracija","tag-geda","tag-julija-steponaityte","tag-lietuva","tag-ligos","tag-lytiniai-santykiai","tag-metoo","tag-nelaimes","tag-nelygybe","tag-paule-bocculaite","tag-priekabiavimas","tag-problemos","tag-psichologinis-smurtas","tag-rezisierius","tag-s-bartas","tag-sarunas-bartas","tag-seksas","tag-stereotipai","tag-uzpuolimas","tag-ydos","entry"],"yoast_head":"\nKokias visuomen\u0117s nelaimes \u012f vie\u0161um\u0105 i\u0161k\u0117l\u0117 istorija apie \u0160. 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Viskas b\u016bt\u0173 nieko, jei negyventum\u0117me numyl\u0117toje Marijos \u017eem\u0117je, kur visi ties\u0105 \u012f akis sako tik\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Be kategorijos"","block_context":{"text":"Be kategorijos","link":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/category\/be-kategorijos\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/mahila.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/c03ba6c2c1eab50711705a3b4b7cf9f0.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1699,"url":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/2011\/09\/10\/kelios-padrikos-vienos-su-kita-visai-nesusije-mintys\/","url_meta":{"origin":3838,"position":5},"title":"Kelios padrikos tarpusavy visai nesusijusios mintys","author":"Mahila","date":"2011 10 rugs\u0117jo","format":false,"excerpt":"\u017dinai, kod\u0117l \u017emon\u0117s nebeskaito laikra\u0161\u010di\u0173? Tod\u0117l, kad ant popieriaus komentaro nepaliksi, kit\u0173 pilie\u010di\u0173 parei\u0161kim\u0173 einama tema nepaskaitysi ir taip pasijusi nedalyvaujantis informacijos perteikimo ir visuomen\u0117s reakcijos \u012f j\u0105 procese. Dabar nauja mada \u2013 varyti ant krep\u0161inio. Taigi yra trys grup\u0117s \u017emoni\u0173: tie, kurie mir\u0161ta \u017eudos d\u0117l visko, kas jame vyksta;\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Be kategorijos"","block_context":{"text":"Be kategorijos","link":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/category\/be-kategorijos\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/mahila.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/tumblr_ofcwfa15kw1r1arpmo1_1280.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/mahila.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/tumblr_ofcwfa15kw1r1arpmo1_1280.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/mahila.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/tumblr_ofcwfa15kw1r1arpmo1_1280.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/mahila.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/tumblr_ofcwfa15kw1r1arpmo1_1280.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pdhVvp-ZU","amp_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/23509443_10213910090453672_1760171807806361170_o-1.jpg","post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3838","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3838"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3838\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3853"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3838"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3838"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mahila.lt\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3838"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}